Seasonal Reviews: Halloween (1978)

By Sean McDonnell

Here’s the film which became a huge success for John Carpenter. Here’s the film which launched the career of Jamie Lee Curtis. Here’s the film which made the slasher genre a success. Here is one of the greatest horror films ever made!

The narrative is very simple. It tells the tale of Michael Myers, who on Halloween night in 1963 at a mere age of six, murdered his older sister with a kitchen knife. Fifteen years later, he escapes from a psychiatric hospital and returns home, stalking teenager Laurie Strode (Curtis) and her friends. Michael’s psychiatrist Dr. Sam Loomis (Donald Pleasence) suspects his intentions and follows him home to try prevent him from killing.

Home is where the heart is!

This is a very special film made with pure ambition and passion with a budget of $320,000 and ended up grossing $70 million worldwide. This is because of its originality and style and it ended up being copied in classics such as Friday the 13th and A Nightmare on Elm Street, satirized in the Scream series and spoofed in the disastrous Scary Movie franchise. The chilling yet beautiful ‘Halloween Theme’, composed perfectly by Carpenter, sets the eerie mood at the beginning with a glowing jack-o-lantern which leads the audience to share Michael’s perspective when he stalks and kills his sister.

Halloween also introduced the cliqué of the morality play often used in slasher horror films. This means any teenager who is sexually active, smokes or who confidently states the AMAZING *sarcasm intended* “I’ll be right back” is at risk of meeting a very tall disturbing looking geezer wearing a William Shatner mask who breathes very very very heavily! 

The cinematography by Dean Cundey is interestingly composed, creating fantastic use of the steadicam to make the camera lens appear as the stalker of the suburbs. The lack of gore is also very effective and instead, Carpenter uses cinematography, lighting and sound to create a frightening atmosphere rather than blood and guts everywhere.

The cast all deliver very naturalistic and charismatic performances. Donald Pleasence brings fear, control and dignity to his role. His character is someone who once cared for Michael but now lacks the ambition because he knows there is no way of getting through to a person who is “purely and simply evil”. Jamie Lee Curtis delivers a fantastic debut as an innocent teenager who tries to escape Michael’s deadly rampage whilst delivering it in a very realistic manner. No wonder why she earned her title and followed her mother’s (Janet Leigh from Psycho) footsteps as a “Scream Queen”.

Still as frightening as it was 35 years ago, Halloween is a masterpiece of suspense, terror and fear in a peaceful-appearing yet haunting setting. Simple, intimate and special. This was the film which single-handedly started and helped shape a new genre of horror!

Sean McDonnell is on Twitter, you can follow him @seanmcdonnell_. 

Sean also has his own blog, which you can find here.

Quote of the Week Review: The Usual Suspects (1995)

By Thomas Broome-Jones

"The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist"

I always found it weird that Bryan Singer directed The Usual Suspects, not because I dislike him as a director, just because it's one of my favourite films ever and I always think of Singer as "that guy who directed X-Men". This week's QOTW is a review of a highly intelligently made film with a multi-layered plot and an unforgettable Oscar-winning performance from Kevin Spacey. This film is so good that even Stephen Baldwin wasn't annoying in it.

The complexity of the film's plot is pretty hard to explain without giving away anything so all I'll say is that Kevin Spacey plays Verbal Kint, a con-man with cerebral palsy who is recounting a story of a crime to a police detective that he was witness to. Sounds pretty simple but when you watch it you realize that it's anything but that. The intricacies on the incredible screenplay by Christopher McQaurrie make this a film where you will constantly be guessing, choosing who to believe and by the end you'll just want to go back and watch it all over again to clarify some points that would be impossible to notice the first time around.

The excellent ensemble cast all deliver characters with their own little quirks, aside from Spacey, Benicio Del Toro stands out especially as Fenster. An ethnically ambiguous man who the other characters are constantly asking to repeat himself as his accent is so wonderfully ridiculous that he's virtually impossible to understand. Following this unlikely team in a story told through flashbacks there will be more and more characters added to the story, giving it more and more layers of sophisticated narrative structure.

I'm not going to talk any further as this film is far too fragile to talk about without spoilers and I make a habit out of avoiding the "s" word in my reviews. All I can say is that the story is told with such punchy dialogue and in such an accessible way that your interests will be vested. Combine that with an electrifying performance from Kevin Spacey which netted him the Academy Award for Best Supporting Actor and you've got a winning formula. I have no more to say about it because I don't want to ruin it for you, simply put, watch this film, it's incredible.

















 
Thomas Broome-Jones is on Twitter, you can follow him @TBroomey.

6 Best Onscreen Deaths

By Alex Beighton

I appear to have gone from one extreme to another, the focus of last week's article being love. I have now taken a more cynical approach (I didn't think that was possible) and explored the best and the worst of death scenes on the big screen. Enjoy.

*WARNING, THIS LIST IS LITTERED WITH SPOILERS, IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THE FILM, SKIP IT*

*CONTAINS CONTENT OF A VIOLENT/SEXUAL/THREATENING NATURE, IF YOU ARE OFFENDED BY THESE THINGS, DO NOT PROCEED*

6. House of Wax (2005)

As much as House of Wax is known for the masterpiece of cinema that it is *heavy sarcasm implied*, my own personal highlight of the film has to be the death of Paris Hilton’s character, Paige Edwards. There is something oddly satisfying about watching a woman with fewer brain cells than a potato being brutally murdered with a pole through the eye, or is that just me? What I also feel completes this “Oscar worthy” performance is the ripped shirt exposing the bra and the over the top screaming, but then again, it’s not like Paris Hilton to be known for being over sexualised/a bad actress so I feel as if this character was her really stepping out of her comfort zone. 

5. Shaun of the Dead (2004)

I am a huge zombie film fan and always have been since first watching 28 Days Later and then Night of the Living Dead, however my favourite zombie film will always be Shaun of the Dead. “The Cornetto Trilogy” has never ceased to make me laugh with unapologetic and ever so British humour until my sides hurt. I feel that this is completely epitomized in the scene where Shaun and Ed fight the zombies in their garden. The one main criticism of zombie films that I always find is that the “normal civilian” dies within 30 seconds whereas the one maniac who for some reason always kept guns and chainsaws in their basement comes into their own and that the rest of the film is based on their antics and one random person who only survived on luck alone. What would happen to the normal pedestrian who may not be a black belt in zombie fighting as soon as the opening credits begin to roll but is tough and willing to survive or at least keep their flesh from being chewed and digested? (Do zombies even have a digestive system?) I feel that this scene perfectly sums up a very English and appropriate response to a zombie attack and I will now forever view records more as weapons instead of musical tools. 

4. Psycho (1960)

There was no way this death could not make my list. This has been the inspiration for every slasher movie since the dawn of time (or 1960 onwards, minor details). Hitchcock is known as the “Master of Suspense” and this scene epitomises how accurate that title is for him. Although in modern times we have been brought up with such films such as the Saw franchise which means we are more surprised when vital organs are actually left inside the body rather than being pulled out right and left on full display to the camera, the scene was revolutionary of its time. Its display of women’s nudity and violence shocked and enthralled audiences alike and will forever be known as “the granddaddy of murder scenes” And on a personal level, screeching violins will now forever haunt me as well as now the bathroom door must remain locked at all times. 

3. Pulp Fiction (1994)

I’ve always been a fan of black comedies and although you may not be able to describe Pulp Fiction as a black comedy, you can most certainly describe my reaction to this scene being “yes I know someone is dead, but why is it so god damn funny?” Between Samuel L. Jackson’s repeated cursing and Travolta’s embarrassed and apologetic nature “I didn’t mean to shoot Marvin in the face man” in my opinion, this is a golden moment in the history of death scenes. And as most of us are aware of Tarantino’s slight over compensation of fake blood, the fact that the car is almost entirely painted by Marvin’s insides is only the bloody cherry on the top of this scene. Not to mention the clear irony in Travolta’s religious ideas before Marvin’s murder, well, more man-slaughter I suppose. 

 

2. Deep Blue Sea (1999)

Samuel L. Jackson has made another appearance on this list for an entirely different reason. Dramatic monologues have always been a clear reccurring theme within cinema; however it’s not often that you get violently eaten by an entirely over animated and unrealistic shark midway through your speech. The shark is genetically engineered to be this super intelligent being, yet it does not have the common courtesy to at least wait until Sammy is done before having to awkwardly twist its jaws around him and shake him about a bit just to re- emphasize the point that yes, he is dead. Frankly shark, that was just rather rude of you. 

1. The Wicker Man (2006)

True, although it is near impossible for me to criticize the realistic and completely believable performances of Nicholas Cage *more heavy sarcasm implied*, this film really takes the cake in bad performances/bad film/bad deaths almost to the point where it’s funny. I can’t quite say I felt the raw pain or emotion behind having BEES STING YOUR ENTIRE FACE by having Nicholas Cage just clearly repeat the lines “my eyes, the bees” with the occasional yell of “ahhhh.” It makes me genuinely sad that Nicholas Cage still has an acting career after this dire performance, as well as the repeated insult of the National Treasure films. But that would start me on a completely different rant that I would find hard to recover from. 

What did you think of this list? Do you agree or disagree with any of my picks? Leave a comment or tweet me your opinion @girls0nfilm. 

From the Vault Reviews: V for Vendetta (2005)

By Sean McDonnell

“Remember, remember, the fifth of November”. This brilliant film based on the graphic novel by Alan Moore, carries its oppressive message that will certainly help us remember the fifth of November.

V for Vendetta is set in a dystopian London which has become a fascist regime led by Adam Sutler (John Hurt). He is faced against V (Hugo Weaving) a freedom fighter wanting revenge on those who disfigured him. A working class girl named Evey (Natalie Portman) becomes caught up in V’s mission for freedom whilst a detective (Stephen Rea) tries to stop V from igniting a revolution.

Dem knives!

What I believe makes this film so special is the message, the message being a warning to the dangers of totalitarianism. The film features interesting aspects of a fascist state which would make George Orwell spin in his grave, like the regime listening to citizens conversations in their very own homes and people who are considered “undesirable” such as political prisoners and homosexuals being sent to concentration camps. Speaking of George Orwell, there’s also so many aspects of this film which remind me of my favourite book, Nineteen Eighty-Four, such as Sutler constantly appearing on large screens and as a cult of personality in citizen’s homes which is reminiscent to Big Brother’s image. Coincidentally, John Hurt portrayed Winston Smith in the 1984 film adaptation of Nineteen Eighty-Four. V for Vendetta also features so many 21st Century fears of a totalitarian state such as surveillance, torture, religious hypocrisy and media manipulation.

Apart from this deep message, the screenplay by the Wachowski’s is very well done, providing the audience with a balance of political philosophy and thrilling action. Weaving portrays V brilliantly, making the audience mesmerized by his character’s desperation for total freedom all whilst being a genius in explosives, sword fighting, literature, philosophy and his personal favourite: gardening. In addition, the performances by Portman, Hurt and Rea have a great balance between choice, power and detection.

My only criticism of this film is that I wish it was more like the original graphic novel in terms of its setting, even Alan Moore still refuses to see this film because it misses so much of the graphic novel. Although the film doesn’t explain the year, my guess is that it’s set in the 2020s whilst the original graphic novel is set in the late nineties. Now, I am ashamed to say I still haven’t read V for Vendetta, but I have done my research into why Alan Moore wrote the graphic novel, that being due to the rise of the Conservatives in the eighties. Quoting from his introduction to the graphic novel: “The new riot police wear black visors, as do their horses, and their vans have rotating video cameras mounted on top. The government has expressed a desire to eradicate homosexuality, even as an abstract concept, and one can only speculate as to which minority will be the next legislated against...I don’t like it here anymore.”

Apart from that mere opinion, this is a meaningful film with an important message that is worth watching. Touching, interesting and a very clear warning. 

V for Vendetta is available in the College Library in a 1 disc edition format, it has a 15 certificate.

Sean McDonnell is on Twitter, you can follow him @seanmcdonnell_. 

Sean also has his own blog, which you can find here.

From the Vault Reviews: Memento (2000)

By Thomas Broome-Jones

My personal favourite Christopher Nolan film is chiefly impressive when you compare its ambition to its modest budget. Mr Nolan has been known to be a very visual storyteller and films such as Inception and Batman Begins correlate very well with that point. But they had huge budgets and crews working on them so it's refreshing to see Nolan's earlier work reflect his flair without having to throw money at it until it looks right.

Inked: Pearce must remember things with various tattoos around his body.

The plot to Memento is told in two arcs, the primary one is in colour and is told in chronologically reverse order, the secondary arc is in black-and-white and is told in a linear fashion through narration from the protagonist, played by the sorely underrated Guy Pearce. Pearce is playing a man who has retrograde amnesia, better known as short-term memory loss. He must piece together a mystery as well as remind himself how to properly function through the use of tattoos, notes and Polaroid photographs. The advantage to such unique storytelling coupled with such a unique story means that we're kept in the dark until the very end, I can usually get a rough idea of how a film will end but Memento had me completely hoodwinked.

The sheer excellence of the story is aided by some highly stylized cinematography (in a Nolan film? Who knew?), which really aids the audience in getting more into the mind of this poor man who has to live in a continual loophole of lost memories. Guy Pearce turns in a fantastic performance that further amplifies his versatility as an actor, his performance is filled with maturity and genuine emotion. Not bad when you consider that he made his name as an actor on Neighbours. His performance is so engaging as well as harrowing that you become just as determined as him to find out what he wants to know. You will also find yourself in a sense of despair when he is constantly tricked into doing things that he otherwise wouldn't do due to his 2-3 minute memory span, which is sometimes even a few seconds if he doesn't focus hard enough.

Never a dull moment to be had, Memento is powerful in its eclectic blend of unorthodox storytelling and human psychology. You will be eager to know what happens next and you'll be blown away by the film's thrilling conclusion which is so cleverly executed that you'll have to re-watch it again and again as more and more theories on what's actually going on become apparent. Forget The Dark Knight, in my mind, this is Christopher Nolan's best film.

Memento is available in the College Library in a 1 disc edition format, it has a 15 certificate.

Thomas Broome-Jones is on Twitter, you can follow him @TBroomey.

From the Vault Reviews: Heat (1995)

By Thomas Broome-Jones

Al Pacino and Robert De Niro, arguably the two most respected crime film actors of all-time. Between them are the likes of The Godfather, Goodfellas, Scarface, Raging Bull, Taxi Driver and countless other American classics. It's a surprise, then, that the first time they ever appeared on screen together wasn't until 1995 in Michael Mann's heist thriller classic, Heat. Whilst the two actors had previously appeared in The Godfather Part 2 together, their arcs were in completely different time periods so they never crossed paths. So, Heat has a lot to live up to if it is the great meeting of two behemoths of film, and it very much does.

Two legends collide: Pacino and De Niro share the screen for the first time ever.

The story is a simple one that sees Pacino's gruff cop Lt. Vincent Hanna go up against De Niro's master career criminal Neil McCauley in an epic game of cat and mouse. The two characters share an amicable respect for one another and note that they are highly similar to one another with the only real difference being their chosen paths. Naturally, the two actors have dynamite chemistry, the mutual respect and conflict is really felt between these two characters and for most of the film I actually found myself rooting for the supposed bad guy in McCauley. But this film isn't just a near 3-hour drama piece of Al Pacino and Robert De Niro exchanging compliments and anecdotes with one another, although admittedly I'd probably watch that. This is a thriller, where action is at the forefront, the only reason why Michael Mann was able to include such strong character development was the run-time, although it didn't feel like 3 hours to me. The film was so fast-paced and brimming with energy that before I knew it it had ended.

Obviously the most famous moment of this film which I can't really not talk about is the breathtaking action sequence at the end which is one of the finest examples of editing and sound mixing that I've ever witnessed in my life. Without giving away spoilers, all I can say is that an intense shoot-out between McCauley's crew and the police goes on for what seems like forever. You hear every bullet fired, see every window smash and, most impressively, you actually SEE the reloads! For far too long has it been that characters in action films have a seemingly endless supply of ammunition, don't be expecting such cliches from Heat. This is one of the most sophisticated action films ever made and the final action sequence is a testament to that.

Gorgeously shot with fantastic direction from Michael Mann, as always. A real tale of life is created here, the story is told like an epic, with big, bold, tough characters on a quest to destroy one another without destroying themselves. But Pacino and De Niro manage to create characters that seem so human, they talk like we do, they have dreams, they eat, sleep, have lovers, have dysfunction. They're believable is what they are, half of that comes down to the brilliance of the actors and the other half is the strength on the screenplay, also written by Michael Mann, with dialogue that's realistic and rough-around-the-edges instead of smooth and uber cool , as is unfortunately the case with most of these flicks. Heat is definitely a recommended watch, for me it's up there with Die Hard, Leon, The Terminator and Aliens as one of the best action films ever made.

Heat is available in the College Library in a 2 disc special edition format which includes 11 additional scenes and 5 making-of documentary featurettes: True Crime: Recalling the real-life Chicago cop and criminal whose exploits inspired the film, Crime Stories: The screenplay's 20-year history and how the film finally got green-lit, Into the Fire: Filming in L.A., how the cast trained for their roles, shooting the climactic downtown heist and post-production, Pacino and De Niro: Anatomy of this historic on-screen showdown and Return to the scene of the crime: Revisiting the film's real-life L.A. locations 10 years later, it has a 15 certificate.

Thomas Broome-Jones is on Twitter, you can follow him @TBroomey.

5 websites that might become your new best friend (if you’re into filmmaking)

By Chloe Burrell

If 'filmmaker’ is your answer to, ‘What do you want to be when you’re older?’, but that’s as far as you’ve got and you're feeling a little stuck, I think I have the answer to all your problems (or at least this one).

I have collected a list of 5 beautiful, beautiful websites that have helped and inspired me as a budding filmmaker in this past year or so. Some of these will also apply to anyone who is thinking of taking up any media career, so stick around even if you aren’t destined to be the next best director!

1. GoThinkBig (www.gothinkbig.co.uk)

I discovered this beauty in a magazine. Their whole idea is to provide young people with somewhere to find ideas, advice and support concerning getting a job in the media industry - and they know it’s tough. They have endless lists of work experience and opportunities, articles on how to do well in interviews, how to prepare for your careers, upcoming schemes for young people, and every single thing in between. You can take a live practice interview, learn how to code, have your CV evaluated...I could be here all day. Just promise to have a look, because it could really be your life saver.

2. NoFilmSchool (www.nofilmschool.com) 

First things first. This website has a free DSLR cinematography guide. Once you push past that excitement (just me?), this website is a great resource created by filmmakers, for filmmakers. It leans towards the interests of technicians with its articles on all the newest and nicest equipment, but also has lots of filmmaking tutorials, interesting interviews with directors and news articles on what’s happening in the film world.

3.Skillset (www.creativeskillset.org)

This is the website for ‘the licensed Sector Skills Council for entertainment media, fashion and textiles, publishing and advertising, marketing and communications.’ Whilst this sounds completely dull, it’s actually an amazing website. It gives you information on all kinds of media industries such as: what the industry is, career profiles, events and opportunities, and most importantly a list of all the Skillset accredited University courses for your subject. If they’re accredited, it means they are recognized as great courses and as a result get extra funding to make them even better, so it’s definitely a crucial list for anyone looking at going to University, or otherwise.

4. My First Job in Film (www.myfirstjobinfilm.co.uk)

Pretty self-explanatory, My First Job is a ‘recruitment platform’ for those looking for a job in film. Whilst this might not be helpful right at this moment, I can really see it being useful once we all finish up our education. It helps you find all kinds of placements from volunteering opportunities to full-time jobs - all you have to do is create a profile for employers. Having signed up out of curiosity, they email you job alerts to suit your preferences and keep you updated with opportunities for your new career!

5. BBC Blast and FilmNetwork (www.bbc.co.uk/blast/225919 & www.bbc.co.uk/filmnetwork)

Granted, I just discovered ‘BBC Blast’ whilst researching for this blog, but I’m glad I stumbled upon it for pages of useful links. It includes seven wonderful programmes that you definitely wouldn’t regret checking out, such as BFI Future Film (BFI’s very own young people oriented organization) and 4Talent (Channel 4’s equivalent). They offer events, workshops and help just for us! 

Finally, I want to turn your attention to BBC’s Film Network - an archive of ‘new British’ short films made by people just like us, be it professional or not. I’ve found some really inspiring (and entertaining) short films on there that have given me fuel for future ideas and projects or even just to cozy up to and watch in an evening. The website, like the others, also includes filmmaking guides, great behind-the-scenes videos for some of the showcased films, and inspirational case studies from people who have already made it in the industry. Worth a look! 

And that’s my list! I wouldn’t prescribe checking them all out at once (two words: information overload) but do check them out when you find yourself with a spare moment, or need a little bit of help with those scary life plans we’re all starting to think about.

Finally, please don’t hesitate to email me any questions or worries you have about film or future related things, I’m always here to help, or point in the right direction!

Chloe's college email is cburrell.27744@farnborough.ac.uk.

Quote of the Week Review: Gangs of New York (2002)

By Thomas Broome-Jones

"I'm gonna teach you to speak English with this f***ing knife!"

I did warn you that the quotes would get harder following last week's! This week we have a pretty awesome quote from one of Martin Scorsese's lesser known films of the 2000s (in comparison to The Aviator and The Departed), Gangs of new York. The film is all about 19th Century New York City and the conflict between the various gangs within the Five Points district, specifically the conflict between the Americans, the Irish and the police, with plenty of sub-divisions internally fighting with each other.

Bill "The Butcher" (right) has become of my favourite film villains.

So, such a concept from Mr. Scorsese must be an undeniable masterpiece, right? Well, not exactly. Don't get me wrong, this is not a bad film, not bad at all, but I don't really see it as anything more than good. Daniel Day-Lewis is easily the strongest point (but when isn't he?), he plays Bill "The Butcher" Cutting, a gang leader with a proficiency in knives. Taking Leonardo DiCaprio under his wing we see their influence and relationship sore, but I won't give away any important plot details. Simply put, Day-Lewis is absolutely spell-binding as always, he really throws himself into the character and puts forth one of his finest performances with a truly authentic New York accent that he has totally perfected. The same can't be said for Leo, unfortunately, his Irish accent isn't BAD, per se, but his real voice slips through one too many times and I found his character to be pretty uninteresting in comparison to Day-Lewis.

The film seems to not be as entertaining when "The Butcher" isn't on screen as he easily has all of the best scenes, the narrative seems a little stiff with a lack of any real direction. I never felt like the film was making any particular comment on anything, it does address certain themes, chiefly racism and immigration issues. But the problem is that they're touched upon so lightly, it takes a back seat to action and doesn't take enough risks to really create a poignant message. Cameron Diaz is also in this film and I do genuinely rate her as an actress but the film focuses so heavily on her romance with Leo when what I really wanted to see was her relationship with Bill. The characters hardly ever talked to one another and yet there is this massive implication that something major went on between them. We only find out through trickles of information, we never get a scene of the two of them alone together to have a real discussion with real development. For a film with a 160 minute run-time it seems to want to focus more on love than actual development.

Definitely not as tight as other Scorsese films, Gangs of New York can really get uninteresting at points and you'll be begging for Daniel Day-Lewis to come back on-screen. But when he does, you'll be mesmerized by his ability, the film's worth watching just for him alone. I do recommend this film as it will entertain you, not to mention some of the set design is truly incredible, but don't be expecting Taxi Driver or Goodfellas. This isn't one of Scorsese's best. But if you're a fan of Marty, DDL and have almost 3 hours free in your day, it is worth your time, albeit just barely.

Thomas Broome-Jones is on Twitter, you can follow him @TBroomey.

6 dysfunctional relationships Hollywood tries to pass off as “True Love"

By Alex Beighton

Love is something that has plagued our screens and dominated Hollywood as a subject matter for as long as cinema has been around. As a result of this, directors and screen writers have warped our sense of romance from the cheesiest romantic comedy to passionate kisses in front of explosions and/or on the top of high buildings. Because of this, I compiled my top 6 relationships in films that lead me to wonder afterwards, “how the hell did they end up together?”

*WARNING, THIS LIST IS LITTERED WITH SPOILERS, IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THE FILM, SKIP IT* 

6. Andrew Clark and Allison Reynolds - The Breakfast Club (1985)

          “The Breakfast club” is considered to be one of the most iconic teen movies of all time and on a level I would agree with that, however the formed relationship between Andrew and Allison at the end of the film can hardly be considered a functional one. At the start Allison is positioned as the disgusting freak that no one wishes to talk to and Andrew is the athlete with an inbuilt filter on who he talks to because of his social status. However despite their differences the characters in the end get together and it’s all happily ever after on a Saturday evening because they love each other despite their differences, right? Wrong. It’s only after Allison COMPLETELY changes the way she looks/dresses that Andrew even takes a second glance. So moral of the story is children, if you want the popular boy to like you, you have to completely change the way you act/dress and become the identical version of a girl more popular than you are. Cynical? Maybe. True? Unfortunately so.

5. Vivian Ward and Edward Lewis - Pretty Woman (1990)

Boy meets girl. Boy falls in love with girl. Boy realizes he is unable to have a functional relationship with her so goes driving about in the middle of the night, finds prostitute and falls madly in love with the prostitute with a  “heart of gold” and the 500 watt smile and ultimately live happily ever after. Not your usual fairy tale story but hey, even the film acknowledges that in the final scene up the fire escape so that’s okay right? The message behind this, as Hollywood loves to include in most romantic comedies, is that yes, the woman is loveable as long as she can completely change her personality and accept the makeover so she is a new person. The idea of “Yes, Cinderella can go to the ball as long as she wears the big dress and lets the prince take her.” Also it seems that Vivien is capable of doing anything she pleases as long as she is armed by Edward’s credit card. Don’t get me wrong when I say the “cheesy romantic comedy” feel to the film can come off as endearing, however I find it also comes across as incredibly patronizing. By the end of the film she is financially dependent upon Edward as well as being morphed into this “new woman that is acceptable in society.”

4. Batman and Catwoman - The Dark Knight Rises (2012)

A romance with a foundation of repeatedly stealing from each other (she’s a jewel thief, what did you expect?), as well as consistently lying to one another throughout the entire time of their sordid love affair. It’s only natural that these two are “destined to be together.” But apart from the evident sexual tension between the two of them, Batman still finds the time to sleep around with Miranda during and, let’s face it, probably after if she did not then intend to blow up Gotham City because that’s often considered a turn off. Also has everyone conveniently forgotten about his sort of girlfriend Rachel who recently died?  That was seemingly too easily pushed aside by Anne Hathaway’s thigh high latex boots. The only things in common the two characters seem to have is a knack for lying and a fondness for tight leather/ latex clothing which a strong relationship does not make.

3. Jack and Rose - Titanic/Titanic 3D (1997/2012)

There are many things that could be considered to be incredibly unlikely/dysfunctional between these two as James Cameron displays their romance on the big screen and then displays it again in the later years for twice the money but this time in 3D for anyone that wishes to see a tragic love affair or Kate Winslet’s breasts in 3D. Firstly, for someone positioned to be a tragic peasant, Leonardo Di Caprio is far too sexy and most of all, clean. Also, when the couple first meet she is trying to kill herself, does that not scream dysfunctional to begin with? A beautiful vagrant and a spoiled princess with a death wish aren’t often positioned to have the healthiest of relationships but let’s go along with Cameron for the time being. They then form a bond on Jack’s passion for life and Rose’s clear boredom of life which only leads me to think, "Jack is completely destitute, why doesn't he slap Rose when all she does is complain about how hard her life is?" Surely that must get awfully tiring after the first time? However I think the scene in the car could be argued as reason enough for Jack to listen through the whining. Final point being, one that we were all left thinking, if she REALLY loved him…WHY DIDN’T SHE LET HIM ON THE RAFT? IT WAS CLEARLY BIG ENOUGH FOR TWO. Also if someone gives you a diamond, you do NOT throw it into the ocean, just my own personal view.

2. Belle and Beast - Beauty and the Beast (1991)

Okay, I get that true love breaks the curse and all that, that all makes sense. BUT, and I hate to criticize a Disney film in any way *heavy sarcasm implied*, surely if she loved him when he was a furry beast creature, Belle must have a certain “fetish” that human Beast cannot satisfy as a “man”. I mean, yes, a beard is attractive on a man, but I do not think Belle is looking for a “man” to satisfy her needs. Yes true love comes in all shapes and sizes, but really Disney? I think Belle has her own issues with relationships and her personal preferences (sorry to crush anyone’s childhood dreams/memories). Also, the main starting point in their relationship was when he forces her to live with him by emotionally blackmailing her? Call me old fashioned but emotional blackmail isn't something I consider to be a healthy romance. 

1. Bella and Edward - Twilight (2008)

When writing this list, this was the couple that appeared the most when I asked people “What is the most dysfunctional portrayal of love in films you have seen?”, Bella and Edward from Twilight. Oh dear. Too much to say, too little time. First of all, the romance starts when he pretty much stalks her but the logic being “He’s pretty so it’s okay.” Regardless of someone’s physical appearance, if I found someone watching me sleep at the end of my bed I would not find it romantic but instead more of the “scream like a mad woman and call the police” scenario. But hey, maybe my views on love are old fashioned and not up to date. I just never realized the definition of stalking was changed to “an expression of one’s true love” rather than “harass someone with unwanted and obsessive attention.”

 Also his main reason for his love is that he can’t resist the way she smells. So the relationship ignores Bella’s awkward/boring/frigid personality to base their relationship on by instead focusing on the fact that he wants to eat her. Yet again, correct me if I’m wrong, but I usually base my romantic feelings towards someone on their personality rather than their smell, otherwise I would date a cheese sandwich. Also before this film, I never realized just how much love can translate through two people staring at each other with a blue filter over the top of the scene whilst orchestral music plays in the background, and the answer is not a lot. This film was also the inspiration for 50 Shades of Grey. That is reason enough to completely disregard this couple as entirely dysfunctional and pity anyone’s warped sense of romance because of it, because infatuation to the point of obsession is not love.

What did you think of this list? Do you agree or disagree with any of my picks? Leave a comment or tweet me your opinion @girls0nfilm.

Gravity Is A Hit With The Critics, But Will The Academy Continue To Snub Science-Fiction?

By Thomas Broome-Jones

If you haven't heard about it already, the director behind the 2006 sci-fi spectacle Children of Men Alfonso Cuarón has a new film out. Gravity has been described as "the greatest space film ever done" by visionary science-fiction director James Cameron, it holds a 97% approval rating on Rotten Tomatoes, a 96/100 on Metacritic and is #39 in IMDb's top 250 films list at the time of this article's writing. Needless to say it has a lot of hype around it and it's a fascinating concept.

Sandra Bullock and George Clooney are astronauts who have their communications with ground control severed and must find a way to survive the cruel mistress of space with a dangerously low time limit. The film is being promoted as highly scientifically accurate and looks to really be playing around with the idea of there being no sound in space. It sounds then, like a modern-day 2001: A Space Odyssey but with a massive budget and pioneering special effects. Going by that then it sounds like it's going to be pretty epic.

Not a sound: All of this action will happen silently in the name of scientific accuracy.

The Americans have already got it but it won't be hitting UK screens until next month, as you can probably tell I'm incredibly excited for this film as I enjoyed Children of Men thoroughly and I'll definitely be seeing this as soon as it comes to our fair isles. But there's one thing I'm interested in more than anything, its Oscar potential. As we all know, this is the time of the year when all of the critically acclaimed films start to come out, we get all the Summer blockbusters in, well, the Summer and as the Winter closes in we are treated to more "artistic" works. The reason for this is simply because it's all about getting your film released close to awards season so that it's fresh on the voting panel's minds, but not to miss the eligibility window. Release your film too late and it won't qualify for any nominations.

Gravity seems to be the most acclaimed film of the year so far and may very well end up being the most acclaimed film of 2013 period. Obviously with the phenominal amount of hype around this film, coupled with its rather sizable box office takings (it's taken in nearly $200,000,000 in just 11 days, not too shabby for a non-franchise and non-sequel film), it would be almost impossible for the Academy to ignore it. But there is a discouraging thing about sci-fi films and the Academy, they've never awarded Best Picture to one. If you were to count Silence of the Lambs as a horror, then science-fiction is the only mainstream genre of film to never receive the prestigious award, could Gravity be the first?

I'm confident that the film will at least be honoured with a nomination and I genuinely do like its chances of winning, I can't recall another film that's been released so far this year with so much critical hype, obviously Iron Man 3 takes the cake for commercial hype but I don't see that getting any more than a few technical nods. If Gravity DOES win the award then what's next? Films such as Christopher Nolan's Batman trilogy, The Avengers and Iron Man 3 have certainly made superheroes less of a niche subject, all being among the top 10 highest-grossing films ever, could the superhero film become a mainstream genre? And in turn would we ever see it win the Holy Grail of film awards? It's a subject with a very long history that I won't delve into but as the awards season rapidly approaches you can expect a lot of Oscar talk from all sources of film journalism and I have a very strong feeling about Gravity.

Gravity is released in UK cinemas on November 8, 2013, it has a 12A certificate.



















Thomas Broome-Jones is on Twitter, you can follow him @TBroomey.

From the Vault Reviews: M (1931)

By Sean McDonnell

One of the more interesting early ‘talkies’ I’ve seen. Fritz Lang dramatically enters the sound era with a film that captures fear, paranoia and the future all in this one powerful expressionist thriller. M launched the career of Peter Lorre, who stars as Hans Beckert, a child murderer who finds himself chased by all levels of society after his deeds cause Berlin to enter into a bizarre state of random accusation. The story interested me mostly because it showed various aspects of class desperate for justice, from the police to criminals.

Das Monster lauert...

Although the narrative is a very simple one, it was one of the first films that involved the hunting of a serial killer in its plot. The audience are not even introduced properly to Beckert until roughly half way through the film, but it doesn’t matter because what I loved most even before Beckert is ever seen is the obsession to hunt him down! More importantly, it was an interesting film about surveillance and how different levels of class use newly developed techniques, such as the police using handwriting analysis and criminals hiring beggars to look out for Berlin’s children. Lorre portrays Beckert very well, presenting to the audience a mentally ill man who can’t help his bloodshed due to his fear of his shadow, his pathological monster! Beckert’s whistling of In the Hall of the Mountain King (performed by Lang due to Lorre not being able to whistle) made me, and I assume the audience enthralled with fear on what was going to happen next.

As this was Lang’s first sound film, I noticed interesting forms of experimentation in contrast to other ‘talkies’ being released at the time, such as sounds occurring off camera and suspenseful moments throughout the film containing nothing but silence then adding a rush of sudden noise. Besides that, I loved the cinematography by Fritz Arno Wagner, it provides the audience with deep expression, especially with the use of glass and reflections which connote Beckert’s entrapment of self. The shots of him in daylight looking at his reflection specifically imply his perception not of a monster, but of a disturbed man. All in all, I highly recommend this as much as I recommend Lang’s Magnum Opus, the 1927 masterpiece Metropolis. A brilliant sound debut from Lang which maybe, just maybe foreshadows German society on the verge of Nazism. 

M is available in the College Library in a 2 disc special edition format which includes the German version and the original 1932 British release version which includes Peter Lorre’s first performance in English, it has a PG certificate.

Sean McDonnell is on Twitter, you can follow him at @seanmcdonnell.

Sean also has his own blog, which you can find here.

Tom's Top Ten - Film Scores

By Thomas Broome-Jones

Film is a visual art, that's a no-brainer. We like to judge a film's strengths based on its ability to create a world that we can really engage with and believe. But every great visual experience can be improved upon with a cracking original score. In this list are the top then film scores that I consider my favourite, let's be clear on this, these aren't soundtracks, these are scores composed for a specific film. They don't necessarily have to be orchestral, but most great film scores are, if we're honest. So, here we go.

10. Tron: Legacy (2010)

 

You know I said that a score didn't have to be orchestral? This is a perfect example of that. What is, in my opinion at least, a pretty underrated film and a solid sequel, Tron: Legacy boasted a score composed by French electronic music duo Daft Punk. Whilst not only being one of my favourite musical acts, the robotic-like enigmas behind the masterful, instant classic and generation-defining album Homework are now amongst my favourite film composers.

They were logically the best choice to compose the music for a film all about technology and boy did they deliver. Their wavy electro tones and bass-heavy beats really shone through in this film and made it that much more enjoyable for me. They even made a little cameo as nightclub DJs as well, gotta love that fan service.

9. The Full Monty (1997)

A truly classic British film with a truly classic score. Anne Dudley's creative use of orchestral instruments give the film two distinctive sounds. One is reminiscent of farcical comedy with its thick and deep tone, somewhat similar to the theme from the TV comedy Curb Your Enthusiasm, and the other reflects the theme of the film perfectly, stripping. A light and whimsical tune with a cheeky edge that you could quite easily imagine accompanying a human being removing articles of clothing in front of a crowd.

A charming comedy with heart needs to have charming music with heart, which it very much does. Anne Dudley is highly overlooked as a composer and it's a crying shame due to her obvious talent, although she did take home an Oscar for this so at least she's been recognized by her peers. But the fact that the public isn't as aware of her is a bit rubbish, really.

8. Taxi Driver (1976)

A film that I consider to be one of the top 3 greatest ever made has to have one heck of a score, and one heck of a score it has. If it wasn't for Hans Zimmer and John Williams, I'm willing to bet money that the late, great Bernard Herrmann's name would be on everyone's minds when it came to the all-time greatest film composers.

Taxi Driver is easily his defining work, the two opposing sounds of soft, harmonious clarity rapidly slashed with frantic flailing perfectly represent protagonist Travis' descent into madness. The score is almost scary in its construction and sounds like something out of a horror film. This was one of Herrmann's last ever compositions, as a matter of fact he died before the film was even released. It's good then that he went out with a bang. In the hands of a lesser composer, Scorsese's classic psychological mind-bender may have lost a significant amount of its emotional impact.

7. Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981)

Let me get this out of the way now, John Williams has 3 spots on this list and I in no way regret that decision. He may be limited to an extent as most of his scores sound pretty much the same, but I was raised on films that he composed and in turn, hum his work on a regular basis.

Do I need to remind you what it sounds like? The triumphant waves of sound that accompany this American classic go hand-in-hand with the adventure and thrill that is presented to us on screen. It's a near perfect theme that fills me with excitement and brings back all kinds of wonderful childhood memories as soon as it kicks in. I remember adoring this film as a child and the Oscar-nominated score is one of the reasons why.

6. The James Bond Franchise (1962-present)

Picking just one Bond film was impossible. This composition has been re-done in so many interesting ways since Dr. No first hit the cinemas in 1962 but the true father of it is Mr. Monty Norman. An iconic theme, it's sharp, suspenseful and thrilling, like every good spy film should be. Definitely a theme that will be with us for a long while, or as long as they continue to make Bond films, at least.

5. Batman (1989)

When you think of Tim Burton there are typically 3 other people that will accompany that thought, Johnny Depp, Helena Bonham Carter and Danny Elfman. This was the composer's second collaboration with the king of gothic wackiness and is instantly recognizable by fans of the caped crusader.

One of Elfman's most famous compositions, the Grammy-nominated score is fleeting, loud, bold and filled with bravado and mystique. I don't know how Elfman did it, but he managed to lift Batman from the pages of the comics and match him as a character. This is probably the most well-known Batman theme, various versions of it have emerged over the years in other Batman films, the animated TV series and video games, I love it.

4. The Dark Knight (2008)

 

It was hard choosing which Batman theme I liked more and whilst I prefer Tim Burton's version as a film over The Dark Knight, I have to edge Hans Zimmer's wicked score to Christopher Nolan's superhero epic. If there's one thing that you can easily identify a Nolan film by, it's the music, loud horns, sweeping soundscapes and flurries of heavy rhythmic attacks. The music works so well with the images on screen in this film, particularly during the opening sequence, wherein the various ticks denote a feeling of time passing by, time being somewhat essential when executing a bank heist. Definitely snubbed of an Oscar nomination.

                    

                                3. Jurassic Park (1993)                                    

Old Johnny boy's back (what did I tell you?) and he's still making me hum his darn scores as I go through my day-to-day life. This is one of my top 30 favourite films ever and the score is a part of that. A film all about the danger and majesty of the creatures that once roamed the Earth recreates such danger and majesty in its iconic theme.

Whilst I'm quite outspoken on my criticisms of Steven Spielberg as a director, his films do have the profound ability to really draw an emotional response from the viewer. If Hitchcock was the master of suspense, then Spielberg is certainly the master of emotion and I think that a key part of that is the way in which music flows with the images that we see in his films. Jurassic Park is no exception to this.

2. Star Wars (1977)

Okay, I PROMISE that this is the last you'll see of John Williams on this list, but considering that he's been nominated for 48 Academy Awards it's pretty impressive that he only got 3 mentions. Admittedly, E.T and Jaws would make an appearance if this were a top 20 list, but I digress.

This is probably the single most iconic score in the history of motion picture music. If you don't know it then it's unforgivable, love it or hate it this theme SHOULD be in your head somewhere. Just listening to it conjures up an image of epic space battles, romance, thrills and epic storytelling in my head. It's classical feel bears similarities to Holst's The Planets, specifically Mars as well as the usual sounds that John Williams produces. This was the composition of my childhood, much like the original Star Wars trilogy were the films of it.

1. The Godfather (1972)

Iconic, instantly recognizable, epic, I struggle to find the words to describe the score to this multiple Academy Award-winning masterpiece. But words are not needed with music, all you have to do is listen.

A tale of crime, family, betrayal, love and loss must be told with such a wide range of emotions and the theme does so with such grace and beauty. Say what you will about it, but this is my number 1 pick for my favourite and greatest film score of all-time.

What did you think of this list? Do you agree or disagree with any of my picks? Leave a comment or tweet me your opinion @TBroomey.